Presenting Definitive Proof of Aliens

Those who know me know that I have a poor immune system. I’ve often joked, though not inaccurately, that I get sick if someone looks at me wrong. You can make a bet that if someone I come into contact with is ill, I will be within days.

Apart from easily getting sick, it takes me a long time to recover. Rather than the normal 7-10 days of recovery for the average cold, it takes me around 3 weeks, and then almost always followed up by a new cold within a month. I scoff at ‘flu season,’ and name it ‘the year.’

But since last fall, the duration of my illnesses has reduced substantially, and despite going to the gym every day in that time, and doing an hour of cardio followed by an hour of pool therapy, exposing myself to everybody at the gym, despite those things, I have not gotten as frequently ill.

Even taking away frequent pleasures like chocolate cake and ice cream, my body has been able to effectively fight against the plague that is my ‘normal,’ even without the happiness brought by the afore mentioned chocolate.

My only conclusion, therefore, is that some time last fall I must have been abducted by benevolent extra terrestrial beings who have modified my immune system to more effectively keep me healthy (though, I wish that they’d have done a bit more on that front, as I still get sick more than the normal person, and for longer).  Really if you take away every other possibility, the only reasonable answer is ‘Aliens.’

So there you have it folks: definitive, though anecdotal, proof of the existence of aliens!

I’ll go reward myself with some chocolate cake and wait for the men in black suits to come get me.

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